To Do Item for Week 2: Check in on loved ones

Hello hello rockstars,

It is 8:46 p.m. right now, and I’m pretty much going to post as soon as I finish writing. Maybe if I actually posted at a consistent time then people would follow me and pay attention to the things I say… Alas, what is this blog besides a glorified journal, anyway?

The past two days were just days where you feel like you just keep getting kicked in the face, and even though you’re getting hurt and this is not what you want, you just keep saying “thank you.” It was just one ridiculous thing after another. Like every tech problem I could have, I had. I couldn’t hear or see anything on the zoom, then every time I tried to filter and sort data on Google Sheets, it would say “revert your changes” or whatever that message is that basically says “stop, you’re doing too much.” So then naturally, I’m making this one partner’s life harder and not easier, which is literally against my entire “just work hard, be nice, and make people’s lives easier” mantra. So I had a nice spiral about that. It was also one of those humbling days when you realize how little you actually know. I have no problem learning, I love it in fact, but oof. Rough vibes all around.

I was also convinced I broke two $4,500 coffee machines at work yesterday, so that’s super fun. Turns out the second one was just not connected to the milk container, so the machine kept trying to steam and froth nothing. The first one is still semi broken but it wasn’t my fault and I was still able to get coffee, so really… I mean, everything is fine.

But you know what’s interesting? Every time I felt like the weight of everything was going to collapse onto me, the universe said, “let me give her a win.”

  • When I was deep in thought this morning, I ran into a coworker when we were both getting coffee (this is the first machine that I thought I broke yesterday but turns out it’s fine. I mean, now it says the “fresh milk” function isn’t working so idk what it gave me instead but whatever, it still tasted good). We caught up because I haven’t seen him in a month. We used to work together fairly often but it’s been quiet on the case we’re on. But we chatted about work, he asked how I’m adjusting, and he updated about his family vacation and his Southwest woes (sad stuff!) and it was a much needed catch up 
  • I chatted with our receptionist for 40 minutes and she said, “you have a really warm, endearing, and inviting energy”
  • When I was really stressed about an assignment that the partner was looking over, he messaged me and said it was a lot of good work and that we “did great.” I was so distraught, I didn’t even believe him. I was like, “I sense a ‘but’ coming” and he had to assure me that it was actually good. Oof.
  • I saw my friend after AGES because she was coming to borrow a textbook, but we turned it into a coffee date and hangout. She also echoed what our receptionist said and said that I’m really warm and liven places up. But we sat in my office and gabbed for 2 hours. We talked about law school and how people always mispronounce our names, and gossiped about life.

The best two moments were two when people genuinely asked how I’m doing. They both know about my friend Shane, and I guess they could tell my energy was off. But they asked “so how are you doing?” and not in the typical way of “how are you?” “good! how are you?!” but in the “talk to me, I’m here for you” kind of way. And that actually made my day. And of course I answered as honestly but still as positively as I could, and both of them were like, “let me know if there’s anything I can do” — once again, in the genuine “I want to help you if I can” way and not a “oh this feels like the appropriate thing to say here” way.

For me, one of the nicest things someone can do is check in on me. Just to let me know that I was on their mind, and it can be in the form of a spontaneous “hey thinking of you!” message, or “hope you had a good day” or “how’s it going?” or spontaneous calls. I LOVE spontaneous calls. My friend Souvik spontaneously called me on Sunday evening and it was such a delight.

One thing that the universe keeps gently and not-so-gently reminding me of, is to check in on people. I get so busy with my life and so busy with whatever things I’m doing that I forget to think about other people. So this week, I’m going to check in on someone that I haven’t checked in with/talked to in a while. Wish me luck. And hey, I challenge you to do the same thing. Talk to someone you haven’t chatted with recently. I’m sure they’ll welcome the message 🙂

Maybe you’ll catch up and make plans, and not in the adult way where it’s like, “Hey let’s meet up… I’m free in 4 months!” But in a real way of “I really missed talking to you, I’m so glad you reached out, let’s pick up right where we left off.” When I saw E this weekend, it was exactly like that.

That was pretty much my last 48 hours. I went through a quick debate on whether I should share this blog with the coworkers I mentioned in the post, but, eh, if they stumble across it on their own (which they won’t ever) then they can know that they had a major positive impact on my mood in the last week. Amazing what a support system can do!


On an unrelated note: 10 Percent Happier has a new 10-day challenge for 2023: “The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness” challenge, and it is currently day 2. If anyone would like to join the challenge and become my accountability buddy, please let me know and we can do it together! Or if you’ve already signed up, let’s become friends and we can keep each other on track!


Until next time,

xo

Sandhya

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Lovely post and wonderful advice 🌻 you never know when checking in can make a world of difference for someone ❤️ and thank you for always checking in on me! 🥰

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sandhya says:

      Awww ❤️💖🤍 always!

      Like

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