Happy double-post day lovelies!
Last year I made a list of things that I’ve learned in 24 years, and to be honest, I think a lot of what I said applied this year too – I don’t think I’ve learned anything new or groundbreaking that I didn’t already know, and I’ve actually been trying to apply the 24 things I did learn – which feels really great actually!
So, I’m sitting here now, drinking freshly squeezed orange juice, trying to decide what to write for my “25” blog post. Perhaps a list of ways to celebrate a 25th birthday? Maybe a list of fun things that come in 25: quarters for example?!
We’re at that point in life where things start speeding up. My dad always said: “The first 25 years of your life reflect your next 75” and that always terrified me, but now I think it’s a really cool concept. Thinking back to past (almost) 25 years of my life, I’m content with where I am. Even though I look at other people who are my age who have accomplished so many more of their goals at the same age of me, I know everyone’s trajectory is different.
So, if all of your friends are out here getting married and having kids and you’re chilling by yourself, then don’t let it freak you out! Trust me, I get it. When I was 12 at one of my relative’s wedding, my aunt joked: “Oh Sandhya! You’re next!” like oh, that’s… lovely. But here I am, almost 25, not engaged, no kid on the way, still chilling in law school with no job prospects, constantly changing my life plan. As a kid I expected 25 to be a lot cooler, but here I am slaving away in law school, taking 16 credits, slogging away… but alas. Let’s hope 25 is still full of fun adventures, pleasant surprises, and lots of love and joy.
25th Birthday Party: Last year, I talked about Margot Robbie’s 24-hour party and how I wanted to do one as well – but with splitting my time between two cities, I thought I would get more comfortable in my second year of law school before I throw a 24-hour rager. But here we are, it’s 2L and I’m still splitting my time between two cities and this year I’m throwing a 25-hour party, from 4pm to 5pm the next day. I have yet to plan it, all I know is, we’re starting with a champagne toast at 4pm, and then ending with a champagne toast at 5pm. More details coming up!!
Ultimately, I decided to make a list of 25 things to do/guidelines I want to follow/aspects of my life I want to clear up, etc. Sort of like a bucket list, but instead of a list of adventurous ideas like skydiving etc., it’s more like just goals and a list of 25 things!
Some of them I hope to complete this year, but I plan to be done with the whole list when I’m 30! (Ahh! 5 years!! Time will fly!). The ** are the ones by 30.
- Participate in a 5K – I’ve been saying this one forever. Literally every May, me and my friend look through all the 5Ks and the Half Marathons and plan to participate in one, but we both get busy and don’t sign up and another year goes by. NOT THIS YEAR. 2020 is our year.
- Unplug for one evening a week – Katie and Michael have been telling me forever that I need to get better at prioritizing myself and I should just unplug and stop letting other people stress me out. Idk if any of you have this problem but I tend to get really absorbed into my friends’ problems and lives, to the point where I sacrifice my sleep, my productivity, etc., to do so. I’ve been told multiple times that I should just unplug and not feel guilty for not being on my phone all the time. This one will be hard because I think I’m a little addicted to getting phone notifications and giving people advice. BUT, that leads me to…
- Spend a night each week reading before bed – A few nights ago I was reading our book club book: “A Secret Place” by Tana French! It’s a murder mystery and I was inspired to pick it after watching Knives Out (highly recommend!). For the first time in a while, I didn’t have any urge to check my phone and I just kept reading and reading!
- Do more things that make me not want to check my phone – This is kind of similar to #2 – I’m used to constant communication with my friends, and if someone doesn’t respond to me right away, my mind jumps to the conclusion: “Good Job Sandhya, you messed up, they’re finally tired of you” but I need to trust my friends!! They need time to unplug too! And I need to realize that I’m not their entire life (in the most un-vain way possible hahah)
- Keep a consistent skincare routine/Take vitamins every day – I used to be so diligent with my skincare routine and waking up and taking Vitamin D, but I’ve since gotten lazier, law school has gotten busier, and I also, have become more forgetful.
- Create a consistent sleeping routine – I have low hopes for this one to be honest.
- Buy a car** – In an ideal world I’d be buying a Tesla, but as I float back to reality, I’d be really happy with a Honda! Steady, elegant, reliable, love it.
- Get a job at a law firm – I feel like I’m the only 2L in the country that doesn’t have a summer job yet (*Tries not to panic*)
- Learn another language! – I used to learn Italian on Duolingo, but I since deleted the app and to this day the only sentence in Italian that I can say is: “I am eating an apple” that’s it.
- Get back into volunteering – I used to do a LOT of volunteering: partly because it was required in our schools, and partly because I was then getting paid to manage volunteer events, but I haven’t done an actual volunteer project in several years. 25 is the year I get back into it!
- Cut out the stupid people – I’ve gotten better at this, but I’m still not great at it =/
- Become more assertive in professional settings – One of the requirements to graduate law school is to take a Professional Responsibility and Ethics course, which I’m taking right now. In our class we have to do these weekly reflections of how our own morals shape with the ABA Rules of Conduct, and the legal profession is one of those self-regulating professions where you’re supposed to report misconduct if you notice it. Personally, I like to stay in my lane, and I do what I’m told, but I need to get better at voicing my opinion in professional settings and speaking up when I don’t think something is being done efficiently or correctly. They obviously hired me for a reason, I should feel comfortable being heard!
- Get married and possibly start a family?** – :]
- Do more impulsive activities – do more things that I love, and do a lot of it – A few things that I wrote on my 24 list were to love unconditionally, live passionately, embrace my weirdness, and love myself! On Saturday, I was walking to the metro after my class and I was listening to a good song on my headphones, and out of nowhere I started bopping along. There were only a few people on the street, and most of them were doing their own thing and couldn’t care less that I was basically dancing and skipping to the metro. So much of my life is consumed with putting off this perfect image – but why do we fall victim to the idea that we all have to be perfect all the time? Why are we victims of social media where everything has to be perfectly organized, everyone has to be having fun all the time, everything has to be the #BestNightEver, and if you didn’t take pictures of it, then it didn’t happen? That’s such a tiring way to live!
- Establish my aesthetic – One of my favorite things is when someone sees something nautical themed or baby pink or baby blue and says that it reminds them of me! I want to carry that aesthetic throughout everything that I have – my desk, my accessories, my clothes for sure, and my general vibe!
- Do some more baking with my mom – My mom is super into trying new recipes, and I always talk to her about wanting to do one with her, but with law school and everything else that’s going on, I don’t make time for it the way I should. I hope to bake at least once a month with my mom, whether it’s making an old recipe, or making a new one! And if I’m too busy to bake, then I’ll at least sit on the Kitchen Island with my textbooks/laptop and give her company while she bakes!
- Become more disciplined in terms of my work ethic and quit procrastinating – Self-explanatory, but also so difficult to do!
- Go a full week without complaining – It’s so easy to get bogged down with the daily annoyances. I’m going to start with a day of not complaining and then work my way up to a week.
- Get better at investing – I’m taking a Corporate Finance class right now and every week I leave the class thinking: “Okay I need to start investing.” and then every week I don’t. 25 IS THE YEAR. It may be later than everyone else, but it’s about time to build my portfolio!!
- Get better at forgiveness – Last year I took a “strengths” test, that listed 24 traits and which traits I easily exhibit and which I don’t. My top 5 were: Gratitude, Prudence, Judgment, Perspective, and Love. The lowest trait on my list was “forgiveness.” Katie recently gave me advice that if someone didn’t intentionally try to hurt you, you shouldn’t be mad at them, and I finally get what she means now. (This is why Katie is a lot more patient than I am)
- Take more pictures (FOR ME!) [See 14] – I love taking pictures, so much that my friends get annoyed at me for it. The thing is, as great as my memory is now, I don’t know what my memory is going to be like in the future – I want to remember all the good moments, all the bland moments, all the evenings I stayed home and watched netflix for hours, all the fun date nights or days exploring the city! I want to take more pictures, but not for social media, for me.
- Plan a trip with my best friends – In 2018 I took a Roommate Trip to Harry Potter World! I want to plan another trip with them soon 🙂
- Get better at accepting uncertainty and spontaneity – This one is going to be hard. I’m so bad at not having a plan. In fact, not only do I have a Plan A, but I have a Plans B, C, and D also. But when all four of my plans don’t work, I tend to start panicking and freaking out. I need to get comfortable with the gaps, and see the space between where I am and where I want to be, as room for growth and not for failure.
- Make more time for the people I care about – This one I think is so important!! Whether it’s spending more time with my family, visiting my brother on campus more, visiting Philadelphia, catching up with old friends, and having more study dates!!
- Have gratitude! – Last one! Once upon a time, “Gratitude” was my greatest skill, but I feel like lately I’ve been too consumed in my own world to pay attention. I keep having to be reminded that I’m lucky to be where I am, and I keep forgetting it. In my first year of law school, all I kept saying was: “This, is the beginning of the rest of my life” and that “Everything I’ve always worked for is starting to come true” but 2L year is kind of like the midlife crisis year, so I need to practice some EXTRA gratitude these days, (and have people remind me that I’m lucky to be where I am).
- Bonus one: Enjoy 25!!
Thank you all for reading this list, I know it was a long one! 😊 I hope that 25 allows me to keep writing blog posts and keep entertaining all of you! Those of you who have turned 25 already, please share your words of wisdom, I’d love to hear them!! ❤
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